Coal Country Roubaix

 Coal Country Roubiax is a small little race in south eastern Ohio, now in its 3rd year. The race promoter is this loud bearded, sometimes not bearded fella, who never stops shouting about how hard “his” race is. He claims there are no flat roads, all climbing, constant hills, harder than all the rest, by all the rest we’re talking; more elevation then Leadville, Crusher, and unbound. We’re talking 13,000-14,000 feet of elevation in 100 miles. That is rather intense, 130-140 feet a mile. Quite a bit. 

Secret time: I’m super scared of elevation and 100 miles. 100 miles is referred to as a century ride, and I’ve never achieved one. My attempt at a century ride during day 1 of the Huracan ( see previous blog posts 😉), ended at 92 miles in a bonk where I couldn’t talk and stumbled into someone else’s campsite, threw money at them, set up my tent, and laid there all night. 

So obviously this race would be out of the question, you can’t do your first century at the hardest race around. …….. or could you 🤨😎. 

The idea of riding 100 miles by myself for my first century ride was not appealing. If I did it from my house, everything is flat, so I’d end up with 100 miles and no elevation…. That’s just a long day sitting on your butt. Then the idea to solo travel a few hours, create a route with elevation, and then ride it alone….. wasn’t appealing either. 

But all these 100 mile races I wanted to do, all had time cut offs. All these race promotors putting out these arbitrary numbers like “14 hour cut off for Mohican” “25.5 hour cut off for Marji” ect… A bunch of boring race directors trying to put the stop to a good time. So what’s a guy to do? How can so get 100 miles in, AND have an epic story? Ya know… the main objective. Stories. 

Well Coal country has no time cut off 👀. Hmmm, it is the most elevation of any other event, but no time cut off?? And… and… and…. You get a completion buckle! Now Mr. Hat has my attention. 

However if the past has taught me anything, don’t sign up for too many events from the couch under a blanket, events like these don’t sell out, so I had time. You can literally sign up the morning of. I bet this guy would even let you sign up after it started and still do it. So I had time. 

Then I walked a marathon in the snow polar roll, bonked for 2 days at the Huracan, bonked 3 days at Arkansas high country….. and all that bonking sure is a lot of recovery, always getting sick after and cold sores, few days to rehydrate and get food to taste good again. So I kinda decided that I had done a fair amount of suffering so far this year and I didn’t need anymore. So no Coal Country, easy enough. 

Then coach Carey chimes in

Coach Carey was my Marji Camp coach in 2024, she coached Group 11, the best group of humans you could ask for. CC is the coolest human ever and even inspired me to write these blogs, As she writes blogs about all of her adventures… and I’ve read almost all of them dating back to the beginning. 

I have been eyeing Coach Carey up for years as the perfect stepmom for my kids, incase my wife were to do something irreversible, like eat SunChips during the live feed of the 2026 Sea Otter classic when Keegan Swenson is in a sprint for the win…. Then I might be in the market😉

So when I saw Coach Carey post that she was making the trip up North to ride the 300 mile, 34k of climbing route… I was getting some serious FOMO.  Coach Carey and no time cut off. Hmm

So FF to 5 days before the event and this dang race director is the most passionate fella I’ve ever come across, this guy is shouting through Facebook, every single day about this race, come support it he says. And a few things are tickling my fancy: 

The first 35 miles is the hardest. 4 out of 6 of the category something or another climbs in the first 35! So don’t get discouraged he says, it gets easier. Well 🤔 hmm, I’m used to Ms. Todd events where it’s always harder at the end. I’ll be fresh for the first 35, then it gets easier… that doesn’t sound bad. 

Then he says : I’ll do anything for you to finish, help with a bonk, give you lights, fix your bike, he would even GIVE you his own bike! Just to finish. So that gave a little relief, like if I’m bonked and have a mechanical 15 miles from the finish, he would do whatever to fix my bike and let me push it to the end……. That’s slick! 

And… and… and… I confirmed that I could park my car next to the start/finish and I was aloud to sleep there as long as I needed……. Because that’s the worst, having a bonk where you can’t talk or walk and you still have a 30 minute drive to your tent. Therefore, the idea of crossing the finish line and crawling in my trunk for a nap was a HUGE selling point. 

So on 5 days notice, I sent the text: 

Dear Coach best friend and Coach growing on me, I know  this isn’t in my programming but what if this weekend I did the longest hardest ride of my life? Pwetty pwease 🥰

Side note: I learned the hard way that the reason you have beautiful coaches is so you don’t get hurt. Not to get you sponsors… although I am magically sponsored by OMM, west end, dispersed, and MEC. So you gotta get the permission slip signed. The coaches see past my couch and know if I’m overreaching. So I’ll listen to what they say. 

Respond from Big and Little coaches: Do it SMART! Pace yourself, don’t get caught up in the beginning, start out paced, “be smart while doing something dumb” 😂

So 5 days out I signed up and immediately went healthy. As much white rice, chicken, bananas, Almonds, Greek yogurt, and water as my tiny stomach would handle. Force feeding all day and all night. Trying to pack the muscles with the best nutrients I could. I didn’t tell anyone about this event, no pressure, it was basically solo, I would be in the back and finish last, but I was aloud! No time cutoff 😎

Now I’m looking at the weather and we will likely get rain in the morning and then once the sun goes down it’s going to get cold. 45 degrees ish. This was my main concern, I’ve noticed that as I start to bonk, I can’t control my body temperature and I start shivering easily, which burns more calories and just makes you feel so much worse. So I need lots of clothes. There are no drop bags for the 100 milers, so I have to carry everything on me. It’s going to be heavy, but the goal is to finish with the least amount of suffering, and warmth will be a big factor. 

I had, wool socks, flat mountain bike shoes, cognitive mtb pants, Duluth undies, wool base layer, polyester Hawaiian shirt, and lightweight rain jacket and pants. I carried in my hydration vest: arm warners, leg warners, extra gloves, hat, baclava, and winter cycling jersey. 

Nutrition has been getting better, I’ve developed a system and was going to try new things. I always try new things on race day, you have to in the begining. The biggest issue I have is with swallowing the food while riding and breathing heavy and being on the verge of dehydration; I don’t know if it’s the gastric surgery and small stomach or lack of experience or what; but I’d have better luck swallowing a handful of sand mid race then dry famous Amos cookies or salted peanuts. Therefore I would need to carry all my specific nutrition. I like fruit snacks, gummy life savors, slim Jim’s, no bake peanut butter cookies, and then liquid calories are a must; so I do flat sprite( let it sit out over night open) and lemon lime Gatorade mixed. The sprite adds twice the calories😉. 

The night before the event I had planned to car camp at the start, but it didn’t start until 9:00 a.m. and I can’t sleep past 5:00 a.m.; therefore with it only being a 1hr 45 minute drive, maybe I should just stay home and sleep in my own bed the night before. That sounds delightful! So I got the car packed and enjoyed a nice evening of hanging the 500 pictures I just received of the kids doing cool stuff and I started hanging them on the confidence wall in the garage while the Mrs went and got pasta for dinner. I ate the pasta all night long and got a decent night sleep. I got up at 4:30, retrieved a 600 calorie oat milk latte from biggby and slowly cruised through the rain to the event venue. 

I arrived way too early, around 6:30, an hour before packet pickup opened, but that’s how I like it. Plenty of time to get my bike put together and pack nutrition and mix cocktails and whatnot. It had rained all night and was sprinkling on and off, supposed to get worse and rain pretty hard the first 2-3 hours of the race, but then clear up and no rain for a few days after. So I got ready slowly in the rain, ducking back into my car often to organize my thoughts and calm down the anxious butterflies. I had done well with race anxiety up to this point, signing up last minute and keeping it hush hush was helping tremendously with the anticipation, but now it was here. 

About that time a truck pulls up next to me, solid rig, duramax, AT4 with a truck bed cap, real legit unit! And out popped Coach Carey and her Ohio liaison DJ! What a brain boost to see CC already! I immediately gave her a hug and we chatted a while about race expectations and future plans this year! It was awesome! 

I got my race plate and finalized my bike, she was heavy with the jones bars, frame bag, seat bag, handlebar bag, aero bars, and mountain feed bag, but!!! It was legit, I was ready for a 100 mile adventure of no flat roads; which actually comforted me because in my mind, pedaling burns the most calories, and I’m trying to conserve calories, so if I push up the hills and roll down them, very little pedaling. Pretty easy 😉

The rain started to come down heavy 20 minutes before the start, I put on my rain pants and jacket and looked at everyone else. I was out of place, nearly all 200 other people were on drop bars and wearing Lycra 🤔, am I the only one feeling this rain? What’s their plan? Get wet and cold and have the fitness to stay warm and pedaling? Hmm, that’s not in my athletic arsenal so I needed the bulky rain gear, and I really wanted my shoe covers on, but no one else had shoe covers so I guess I’ll just have wet feet for 100 miles because I’m nervous?? Silly thought, I know. 

I lined up in the back and we were off, riding through the wet streets of Lisbon, Ohio and immediately at the first climb. Bye bye everyone else, I’m walking, gotta keep my matches until the end. Rite before the climb I passed the race promoter, Mr. 2 door wrangler and shouted to him that “I’m the last finisher of the 100, see you tomorrow”

Now 1 mile in and on a 500 ft climb it was just me, on a wet adventure in a new place. Settle in and enjoy. I had a few brain strategies in mind: 

First I would post about the race just before it started, I’ve got some killer homies in the 2 wheel community that would comment support, and I would not look at that post until mile 80, that would give me some extra brain juice toward the end. 

Second would be silence for the first 35, just me, the rain, and my bald tires in the puddles. Letting my mind rest and my soul enjoy. There’s a lot too work out in the beginning if an epic, hard, out of your limits adventure. Once the adventure starts, the anxiety of what if; is gone. Now it’s like… well here we are, we trained for this, time to execute. 

The third was: no energy gum until dark. 

This would break up the long day into more manageable segments through the long day. 

I’m anticipating 15-18 hour finish. I had my lights already mounted and a battery backup with charging cord incase something happened or I was out longer. No worries 

Now I’m on mile 1, and climb 1/17. 400-500 ft for the first one. I pushed up it in zone 2 heart rate as designed, snacking as I went. As I got to the top, my next new strategy that Mr. hardcore got me on, Maple syrup! At the top of every climb I would take a big ol gulp of maple syrup! It was great, it was wet and sweet and slid rite down my throat, a big shot of slow burning calories to fuel me to the next climb, about 2 miles away. 

Now I don’t know how the gps determines these climbs, they were from 720 ft to 128 ft? With rolling hills of all heights inbetween. But regardless it gave me a goal, make the next climb, how much can I eat before the next climb. The strategy to walk anything that I felt would increase my heart rate was slowwwww and tedious! I felt like I wasn’t an endurance cyclist, I felt like I was just a guy walking up a hill with a bike to balance himself; but then I would quickly do the fact check( drtbag tool): 

Fact: we’re walking slow, heart rate is down, nothing hurts. 

Fact: if we can still feel this way at 60, 70, 80 miles, this is worth it. 

Fact: my previous mileage record is 93; and my elevation record is 9000. So this is a significant “new territory” where I have no idea how my body will react. 

Fact: there is no time limit

Fact: eat. Eat now. 

And then I would calm myself down and press on. 

Now that I was in the back and all alone, I decided that wet feet would suck, so I should STOP EARLY!!! Ha! Before things get worse. So I did, at the top of the first climb, I stopped and sat under a pine tree in someone’s yard and put my shoe covers on. They kept water out for an hour and then kept water in after 2 hours. 

The rain continued, and the roads were covered, flooded in spots, muddy in other spots, so much water, nothing would stay dry, the temperature however was not terrible, around 60 degrees, but the descents would get chilly. I was going slow anyway on the descents, my tires were worn and I was in no hurry to crash. Slow and steady. 

I don’t look at time during these adventures, or mileage, it doesn’t matter, it will only increase my heart rate. I go by feel these days and I love math, so I would keep a running total and add up the distance between climbs to get an idea, a little something to distract my brain. 

I believe it rained about 3 hours, I was soaked all the way through, but I was feeling good. I had bandaids on my nipples that I learned in Arkansas, and bag balm from my belly button to my knee caps. No chaffing anywhere. No pain. Just slowly checking climbs off the list and wondering if any of these cute little 70’s camper homes in the woods have any amenities or are just sheltered areas for whiskey bent and hellbound white guys to nap inbetween atv excursions. 

Once the rain had stopped and things started to dry out a little; I was at number 5/17 climbs and they had been doozeys, 400-720 foot each, pretty steep in some spots. So I was thinking this first aid station at mile 35 would be here soon? Well about an hour later and 1 more climb I had arrived at aid station 1. I put a coke in my bag just incase, grabbed some snacks… just incase, topped of water and kept moving. My heart rate had been controlled, the hardest part was over. 

I sent a text to my family in my update: 35 miles done, hardest part, brain and body pare perfect. 4-6 hours until the next aid. 

It was just after 2:00 p.m. and it had taken a solid 5 hours of moving time to make it 35 miles. 35/100 x 5 hours means that 15 hours is in sight. I’ve had a good handful of adventures over 15 hours, so this ain’t bad! 

I was allowing myself noise now, as a reward for keeping the brain positive so far. I had downloaded the latest rich roll podcast Who was interviewing Max Joliffe, the guy that just won the Mammoth 200 ultra running race. I was pumped for this one, I’m a big ultra fan and Max has a few really great and creative documentaries on YouTube about his career that I highly recommend. 

Rich and Max talked about how Max was an addict for 10 years and then was forced to get sober in jail and then accidentally found running. And he said that people who have been through really terrible experiences; physically or mentally; are drawn to these long terrible events that push the limits of every ounce of your being, because they have already experienced their “worst” and now when they are at mile 150 and in physical agony, we can remember that this suffering is a choice and a privilege, compared to our previous life of suffering that wasn’t so… 

I agreed with this, theres something rewarding about continuously pushing your limits and finding new pain and then developing skills to push past it, it’s addictive 😂. Which is another trait of us “pain seekers”, we are addicts, you have to be addicted to torture yourself for hours upon hours and days upon days. 

The whole process is addictive, the training, the failures, the successes after those failures, and my favorite! The recovery🥰. Fact: after you ride 100 miles and 13000 feet of climbing, you must lay around and sleep and eat AND it’s not being lazy! It’s necessary😎

So now 2 hours have passed and a few more climbs and I’m all pumped on this podcast and my clothes are drying, wheels are turning, fruit snacks are being swallowed, just going through the motions. Executing the plan, enjoying the day. 

I wasn’t sure where the next aid station was going to be, but mathematically you’d think between 60-70. Likely 65ish. So that’s over halfway, I’d guess around climb…10? Well climb 10 came, 11, 12, hmmm. I’m feeling like all my liquids are running low, my bottle is empty, my pack is light and doesn’t swoosh back and forth when I wiggle it side to side. Yur boys gunna need some water. Did I miss an aide station?!? I had been religiously staring at my gps, because if you miss a turn in Coal country, you’re adding hundreds of feet in elevation and quick.

So I broke my rule and looked at my phone, I was at mile 71! I had definitely missed the aide station. I don’t know how, but I did. So I pulled up Facebook and messaged the race director, I had no worries because this dude was legit, he would bring me water, or I would stop at a house. Not a big deal. I sent him a message and pressed on. 

Then oddly enough, I spotted my first humans in several hours, 2 guys were 1 hill away from me! I needed to catch them so I could ask about this aide station debacle. I peddled harder and they stopped 🙂, allowing me to catch them. They also had not seen the aide station needed water, luckily they had Mr. RAAMs digits and had already been in radio contact and he was on his way. 

Less then 3 minutes later he pulled up, guard dog and all, with snacks and water. 

Side note: I had my rear light on my bike and charged. As I was instructed for night riding. Well when I went to turn it on, on a busy road section, it was completely covered in mud, after I scrubbed all the mud off, I discovered that it didn’t work?? What the heck! I’m sure I charged it! But, I’m prepared, I have my battery backup and cord, so I plugged it in to charge and pressed on. It was not dark yet so I had time to charge. 

Now back to the guard dog and the leash holder; they brought snacks and water, I topped off with water in my hydration bladder, and poured a 12 oz coke into my 24oz water bottle. This is KEY! It allows enough room to build and loose carbonation on bumps with minimal discharge! Tip of the day. Ur welcome 

I then retrieved my red blinky light that was charging and its flashing red and won’t turn on. Well shucks. This is an issue. A dark visibility issue, but these are low traffic roads, very few cars if any, and I had a headlight for my bars and my helmet. Worse case scenario, I would put my helmet light on backwards and I would have a light in both directions. Not ideal but doable. So I asked if the leash guy had a light, he declined, but the fine fella in Orange that I had caught up with, had a spare! Awesome guy! 

So I strapped up the light and continued on. It was getting pretty dark in the woods so I turned the outbound lights on the lowest setting, put on my playlist that has my music and the kids, that always gives me a smile to hear the silly stuff they listen too. Thankfully the massive climbs were gone and it was mostly small ones the rest of the night. After dark the dog encounters started to increase. Kinda creepy because you only hear them, then see their eyes, and guess the height and threat level. I got chased 3 times but screaming “GO HOME” as loud as possible always worked. 

The closer I got to the end the less real chewable food I was consuming. I was running on coke and syrup only. Brain and body were good but the syrup started making me nauseous with 20 miles left. But I was close enough that I would easily finish someway. 

One of the highlights of the ride was the pitch black late night descents, the roads were flat and smooth asphalt, some even freshly paved, and the grade was so slight, I was comfortable to just sit in the arrow bars for miles at a time and confidently weave back and forth into the darkness, euphoric to say the least. 

The descent were getting cold though, so even though I wanted to push to the end, I knew the smart thing was to stop and re dress, so I did. I was now warm on the descents and had the wherewithal to remove my helmet and unzip when pushing up the last few climbs to limit the sweat. 

With only a few miles left I had finally completed climb 17/17 and I could smell the poptart I had left on top my car in the rain at the finish, I was that close. The kinda close like when you gotta poop real bad and as soon as you turn onto your street the 60 second belly timer starts. 

Well the puke timer was going off after that last climb, it was either that I had stopped with solid food, or my body knew I could actively push and puke for 5 miles, but the nausea was active on the last bit. I held of the vomit and had now hit that final 500 foot descent and saw the town of Lisbon. Absolutely stunning with all the lights, no one awake at all, I would see all the traffic lights changing the same time down the main road in town. Pretty epic. Then I strolled through; those same lights, all alone and silent. Mixed in with not bonking for the first time ever at an event, pr on my longest ride and most elevation! Hot diggity dog, that was the best I had ever felt in my life. 

Then another steep climb 😂. I pushed up the last climb too see the spotlights of the fairgrounds and the finish. I killed my bright lights and rolled into the finish at 12:16. 15 hour and 16 minute finish. I was immediately congratulated by Mr. Elevation himself, I received my completion buckle, took a finish line pic and meanface selfie and this one was DUN! 

100.81 miles 

13,180 feet of elevation 

14:20 moving time 

15:16 elapsed time. 

Best accomplishment ever. 

I retreated to my car, absolutely on cloud 9, to have the ONE and only Coach Carey emerge from the darkness on her bike and roll rite up to our vehicles. 

She claims “ some sort of issue that led her to turn back at mile 100 and finish by riding back to the truck with 151 miles, but I know the truth! My kids future step mom wanted to congratulate me at the finish! And I’ll forever be grateful that she sacrificed her day, to see my day through 🥰 💜 her

I had enough energy to then drive home, get a shower and snuggle up next to ms. Hot Stuff. 

Epic adventure✅