Exaggerated adventures by Ted

  The Mohican 100 is the first big mountain bike race of the year, and the most “local” event to me. It always rains and it’s always muddy and it has tight cut off times. I had completed the 100k version of this race in 2024, therefore in my mind, the next time I would need to complete the 100 mile! Makes sense rite? Well, this 100 mile has 13k of climbing, which is the same Stats as coal country! Ya know, the race I did a month ago…. See previous blog 😉.  Side note: at coal country there was no cut off time and I leisurely completed it in 15.5 hours.  So now if we break down the math: Mohican 100 mile is 70% single track and has a 14.5 hour cut off. Coal country was all gravel roads, no cut off time, cool promoter and it took me 15.5 hours.  Gravel roads minus 70 miles for single track plus a 14.5 hour cut off minus cool promoter equals….. no way I can finish.  But as we discussed earlier, I have already done the 100k, so 100 mile it is. Also 3 of my best dirt...

 Coal Country Roubiax is a small little race in south eastern Ohio, now in its 3rd year. The race promoter is this loud bearded, sometimes not bearded fella, who never stops shouting about how hard “his” race is. He claims there are no flat roads, all climbing, constant hills, harder than all the rest, by all the rest we’re talking; more elevation then Leadville, Crusher, and unbound. We’re talking 13,000-14,000 feet of elevation in 100 miles. That is rather intense, 130-140 feet a mile. Quite a bit.  Secret time: I’m super scared of elevation and 100 miles. 100 miles is referred to as a century ride, and I’ve never achieved one. My attempt at a century ride during day 1 of the Huracan ( see previous blog posts 😉), ended at 92 miles in a bonk where I couldn’t talk and stumbled into someone else’s campsite, threw money at them, set up my tent, and laid there all night.  So obviously this race would be out of the question, you can’t do your first century at the hardest rac...

 Dirt Bag Camp was scheduled to start on Sunday at 3:00 p.m. central time, rite before spring break but, like all good cults, you can’t put a leash on these “athletes”. I use the term athletes lightly because they’re really just a bunch of old people having a mid life crisis that involves exercise.  Luckily, I’m not grouped in with “them”. I, myself, am a delicious looking 37 year old who looks 22 from the forehead down. …. Not even being funny, I get Id’d at the grocery store when I try to buy children’s Tylenol!  So anyway, I don’t mind gracing the old folks with my young youthful energy, it’s kinda like a service I provide to the pre-elderly.  Ok, ok, back to Camp. So it was suppose to start at 3:00 on Sunday but, no chance you can keep these fine athletes caged up with an arbitrary number like 3. I left 6 days early, completed the 13 hour drive and arrived in Bentonville at 7:00a.m. Wednesday morning.  I had a side project where I was going to ride around in...

 My eyes eagerly opened at 5:00 a.m. on the dot. El Carlos had a conch shell he was going to blow into at 5:00 a.m., after he flipped the coin and the route direction was chosen. I heard the Conch and grabbed my phone to check my email. Clockwise direction!  That was bad news. My gamble had not paid off. My 50/50 shot was now 100% going the wrong direction. I quickly pulled out my gps and started loading the CW route. Calculating, calculating, calculating, and 13% dead stop. Just will absolutely not load. Ok panic is setting in. What can we do? Start over I guess?. So I reset my Garmin and delete and reinstall the apps on my phone. Big mistake. Now I’m really lost. I have next to no cell service and no WiFi.  Ok calmly pivot. It’s 5:45. I’ve got 2 hours and 15 minutes to the start. Starbucks has WiFi and is 17 minutes away. Do it, go! Now! Time is ticking away. Make a decision and go! So I did.  I pulled the sheets from my windows. Left my bike leaning against a tree...